3 Months

Well...I thought it would be easy to post once a month on this blog. Turns out motherhood takes more time than I thought! I write this with baby sound asleep on my shoulder. Feeling his steady breaths on my chest, smelling his baby smell, it is pure bliss. It even outweighs my desire to pee... bad timing there.

We have had a summer of adventure, learning, and fun. I am officially going back to work this Friday. Am I scared? Hells yes. Am I ready? Actually, yes. It has been almost 9 months of time off, and I am excited to get back to it. Tonight I am going in for a few hours to dust off the cobwebs in my post-pregnancy brain, figure out where everything is, what my passwords are and maybe read a few thousand emails. I have been told it will all come back to me, but I have never been away from any job this long, so we shall see.

I am excited to be settling into my new lifestyle and role as a part-time nurse and full-time mom. It still sounds weird to call myself "Mom," but I love it nonetheless.

I am overwhelmed by the idea of explaining all of the adventures we have been on, so here are some pictures.

Camping with a five-week old was a success! His onesie didn't lie, a "Happy Camper" he was!

Our tent (that Sean has had for 20 years) leaked...surprise, surprise. Sean's middle of the night creativity kept us dry!

We visited Aunt Bryn and Uncle Rod. Bryn introduced herself appropriately as his Auntie Mame and he looked up at her and smiled a huge gummy grin. "You just bought yourself a trip to Australia," she replied. We even realized that Jay looks A LOT like Rod's baby picture!

Jay's future lady-friend Annalise came to lunch with us...and her cool Mom Jana too.

Jay and I drove up with Clare to Appleton to visit Babs the week before Andrew arrived.

Momo fed him a bottle or two in Minocqua. Tater Tot was not a fan of a little boy taking away the attention...she was scared of Jay.

I love this.

Tracy and Doc Watson hung out with us one day. We were so happy to catch her on a rare day off from Camp Manito-wish.

Coordinated Fourth of July outfits!

Andrew is here!

Jay finally got to meet his Fairy Godmother, aka Kyla.

Another beautiful day at the beach on Lake Michigan with the Rands and Roes.

Now we will brave the heat for a walk before I go in to work :)

2 Months

We have had a very busy month. One of our adventures was when Jay first turned 1 month and we went for what has become our annual Memorial Day Weekend trip to Door County with some of our very best friends. This is the third year we have gone and stayed at Dave's grandparents' cabin on Lake Michigan. Mary and Andy's daughter was born the first year we went, so it has been such a neat landmark to see how much she has grown every year. Now we get to add Jay to that landmark!

The view from the cabin- gorgeous! Mac and Lucy are enjoying the view with a cup of hot coffee in the morning.

This picture is from our first year. We biked to a cute little festival in the town (I think it was Jacksonport, but might be wrong). We also went on a 30-mile bike ride which ended with beers and cheesecurds at a wonderful townie bar. 

As it was a warm spring, a bunch of us even swam in Lake Michigan. (By "swam" I mean jumped in and ran out as fast as possible)

This is from year two. Here are just us women at a local winery. Sean didn't go with us to Door County as he was busy celebrating at his brother's Bachelor party in Vegas (they went to church and played checkers all weekend I think). Kate was able to join us though! We did another 30-mile bike ride which ended at the same bar with beers and cheese curds...but Sarah and I got in a ridiculous bike accident a 1/4 mile from the bar due to a porcupine sighting. I fell over in slow motion and needed to replace my rear tire...but the porcupine was uninjured! (I've never claimed to be graceful)

This year we played on the beach a lot. Kate and Mac and Caitlin couldn't join us, so there was considerably less exercise. The Roes, Sean and Dave began the traditional 30-mile bike ride...but the Roes had to shorten their ride due to a certain two-year-old (who shall remain nameless) who decided she needed to know what a balled up piece of raisin-box cardboard felt like jammed in her ear. Sean and Dave still finished the ride only to discover that our townie bar is closed! Cherry Pie and ice cream was consumed instead. Sarah and I hiked at Whitefish Dunes State Park then went to buy the pie and ice cream. I was going to stay in the car at the creamery, but decided a photo opportunity was worthy of taking the baby out of his car seat...

Which has begun our collection of pictures with Jay next to large items...but I will save that for another blog post altogether.

Okay. Somebody just peed through his second outfit of the day and needs me to change him (Sean, obviously). Think its time for the next diaper size? 

1 Month of Bliss

Jay is 1 month old today!

I can't believe how fast time has gone. So far he has been a stellar baby. He loves snuggling, hates having a dirty diaper and is completely indifferent to getting bathed. He grunts all day and night and often sounds like he's clearing his throat, but also makes a noise Sean says sounds exactly like a billy goat. Although its early, I swear he has been smiling for real (not just synapses firing, I'm talking a big ol' grin at appropriate times). If anyone's kid would smile early, it would be Sean's though, right?

Being on bed rest gave me a lot of time to think, which can be a good thing and a bad thing. I thought through every item on my registry, even checking Consumer Reports for the best items. The time also allowed me to fully assess all of my fears about pregnancy, delivery and parenthood. It therefore gave me a healthy perspective on what kind of parent I want to be. Sean and I both feel that the most important characteristics to strive for are going with the flow, always appreciating every moment and loving with all our hearts. I thought it was a pipe dream to follow through with that, but have found that in the past month, we have both naturally and intentionally lived by these rules.

Everyone always hears the age old advice that when kids come along, you have to just go with the flow. We have been so lucky that our little guy is an incredibly easy baby. He eats well. He sleeps well. He hangs out like a champ.One aspect of parenting has me stuck in the not-so-easy-going category. I admittedly have been obsessive about germs, and have struggled a lot with deciding who can hold him and where we can take him. I am still very anxious about this and find that I just want to hold him close to me whenever we are in public or around other people. Do not feel offended if I didn't or don't let you hold him, it takes all my willpower just to let anyone except Sean and I hold him. I am working on it. Be patient with me, I'm a first time mom and worked really hard to get this guy, I'm just going to be protective of him.

I despise when people complain about being pregnant. After my first miscarriage, I felt like everyone around me was pregnant, every TV show had pregnant characters and every elevator I stepped onto had a glowing pregnant woman rubbing her beautiful, bulging belly. If I heard any complaints I just fumed. "If ONLY I could complain about those things," I thought. When I finally got pregnant again, I swore I would never complain about the bad parts. Sure I was nauseous, fat and missed drinking tequila, but hell if I was going to say that to anyone. You never know who is struggling or has ever struggled with trying to get pregnant. This thought process was taken to a whole new level after my emergency cerclage at 20 weeks. I joined a support group online for women with an Incompetent Cervix (IC). The amount of women with IC who hadn't been diagnosed from first losing a baby in their second trimester was slim. I knew I was lucky, but quickly realized just how lucky I was to have caught the problem just in time. Every day that I stayed pregnant, I thanked my lucky stars (and God) (and my perinatologist) that I wasn't leaving my baby in the NICU. I am not saying I didn't falter and get angry for my circumstances, but for the most part I tried to stay positive and not only be grateful, but also enjoy being pregnant.

Now that I have my beautiful, healthy, baby boy (currently sleeping in my arms as I type), I strive to always appreciate him and never take him for granted. I don't want to look back on his childhood and wish I had enjoyed it more. I will strive to always live in the moment and savor the snuggles when he wakes me at night. I will cherish his wails because it means his lungs are strong and I will laugh about the time he puked milk all over both of us just after we've both bathed and dressed...and then smiled at me with such satisfaction, because, well, that was just kind of funny. Too many people never get their happily ever after, and Sean and I try not to forget that, at least for right now. we did.

The third aspect of parenting we are attempting is easy. Loving your baby is natural. Even when he's a teenager and I don't like him much, I will still love him with all my heart. Sean rushes to him every night when he gets home from work because 9 hours was too long to be apart. While holding him close one day he said to me, "I'm almost afraid I will squeeze him too hard because I love him sooooo much!" When I look at him for the first time in the morning, I feel excited to see him every day, as if 4 hours was too long not to be staring at his perfect face. I could go on, but you all might vomit. Like I said, it is just easy to love your own baby.

Welcome!

Thanks for coming to my blog! I am using this venue to write about my little family, which includes my husband, Sean, our baby, Jay and Lucy the lab. We both come from large (and in charge) families and long distance friends so this is a great way to let them/you know what we are up to and share pictures. 

I blogged throughout my unique pregnancy with Jay. You can find that blog at:  www.malispregnancy.blogspot.com